Friday, June 3, 2011

Another Pointless Post That Will Receive No Feedback.....

     So, this, will likely be the last post of this sort, seeing as NO ONE responds to my impassioned pleas for assistance.  *dejected sigh*
     I want to know what ya'll wanna see up in here! So, if ya wanna see a particular feature, style of post, or just have some ideas on some cool stuff, Tell me! I'm interested in what will make you guys happy! haha, so just gimme some feedback, yo!
    Or not. I could just remain lonely and dejected......XP

Post Title Challenge: The Sequel

      While I pledge, in these challenges, to use a title submitted by a reader/heckler, I shall admit that I simply felt as though this title should be modified.  Therefore, instead of the title "The Uniqueness of Laughs" that was suggested, I have modified it to the title actually displayed.  Nevertheless, this post would never have occurred had it not been for the imaginative talents of one Megan "Yo" Trantham. So, without further ado, it is my great pleasure to present to you, my readers,

   The Necessity Of Laughs
     A snort, a chortle, a chuckle, a crow.  Can anyone truly describe the divine beauty of a laugh?  Is there a more beautiful sound than a free, uninhibited cachinnation?  I dare say not. A laugh is an honest expression of mirth, joy, peace, beatitude, and felicity.  No matter the nature of a laugh, it sends both the producer and the hearer of the harmony into celestial rapture.
     All these are undeniable facts. I however, would like to posit the concept that such an intonation is absolutely essential to life itself.  Studies conducted by the B.R.A.I.N.* demonstrate that frequent verbal show of merriment has the ability to lengthen your life by as much as 20.57389 years (180217.5164 hours).  Also, in a study conducted by the combined efforts of B.R.A.I.N. and G.E.N.I.U.S. Society,** subjects between the ages of 17 and 49 who experienced intense laughter at least twice a week were shown to have increased IQ scores of up to 23 points when compared to their less-mirthful peers.  There were also shown to have increased happiness, satisfaction in life, financial stability, SLQ (Sustainable Living Quotient), and weight loss (up to 94 pounds in some subjects).
     How can you see these results? Well, it's not by sitting on your couch with a Monster and a bag Doritos watching reruns of Whose Line Is It Anyway, I can tell you that!  No siree!  For this kind of success, you need AeroLaf - the all new, FDA approved form of Dinitrogen Oxide. AeroLaf is guaranteed to give you fast, satisfying results in only 17 treatments!† With AeroLaf, you'll be laughing your way beauty, fame, and fortune in no time flat!  But hurry; if you call now and order a 59 oz. aerosol can of AeroLaf, we'll throw in our collector addition travel size can ABSOLUTELY FREE!  Don't wait; Call now at 1-800-AEROLAF! That's 1-800-237-6523.  Call now!


*Bureaucracy of Radically Astute Individualistic Nitwits
**General Enfranchisement of Nerds In the United States Society
†Do not take AeroLaf if you are nursing, pregnant, may become pregnant, are under seventeen, are over forty-nine, are under five feet tall, are over seven feet tall, have ever been to Ireland, may ever go to Ireland, or have a heart condition. Side effects may include nausea, headaches, excessive sweating, excessive salivating, sudden urges to travel to foreign countries, sudden revulsion for victims of depression and natural disasters, expulsion from funerals, and even death in rare cases. Do not continue to take AeroLaf if lack of amusement increases.  Contact a medical professional if you notice changed behavior or experience these or any other side effects. Ask your doctor if AeroLaf is right for you.
    

Thursday, June 2, 2011

It Is Only Logical.....

.....that I should have a Star Trek post, as I'm beginning my first "official" Star Trek marathon.  Though I've always enjoyed the series, I am only now pledging to actually watch every episode - a pledge that seems long-overdue.  Much to my chagrin, Netflix's refusal to fulfill their Beginning-of-June-Instant-Streaming promise means I can only get them in the mail via disk, which takes FOREVERRRR (alright, three-day turn-around. whatever.) and I can only get three discs at a time max. Which, of course, sounds sufficient to most, but is not so to me. However, I shall persevere despite the great persecution from the powers that be.
     Really? An entire post about your starting a Star Trek marathon. You're pathetic.
     Whatever. I was born this way. It's not my fault. It's in my blood.
     That's no excuse. You can change; you just have to want it bad enough.
     But I have no desire to affect such a change.  I am perfectly comfortable with nerdality.
     Then we shall depart, seeing as there is really no way to convert you. Fare thee well.
     Live long and prosper


     P.S.  Just so everyone knows, Spock is most definitely in the running for awesomest dude to ever grace the airwaves. Just sayin'.
The Ol Eyebrow Gif - The Ol EyebrowSpock'd Tap That