So, Judgment House is over :'( But it was awesome!!!!! 40 Salvations!! And just all around great times. Couldn't top it if I tried. And it really helped me get to know some people and feel more.....at home, i guess....in the group. I'm still not really friends with anyone :/ But at least don't feel as awkward......
Saturday night after Judgment House was over, we all went to Spencer's house for Star Wars nite :D His room.....danggggg......He's more of a Star Wars freak than I am! hahaha, he's awesome. Only a few of us actually stayed for the whole movie lol.
Sunday morning, it was.....different......Brad noticed it too. In his words, "Everyone talked together." There weren't all those little groups, isolated, closed systems of gossip and gregarious frivolity. Instead, we were all talking in 1 or 2 large groups. And these groups interacted with each other. And I actually felt comfortable enough to be a part of the group. It was weird, but it felt really good.
Then, last night, I went to Megan G.'s bonfire. It was fun. Most of the people I really feel most comfortable around were there. We laughed, talked, joked around. I didn't know everyone, but I knew most of them. It was nice, just sitting around a fire, going on a hayride, joking around with people, scaring a few. It just felt.........natural.
I just hope all this can last. I hope it's not just forgotten in a couple of weeks. I think too much. I wish I could just enjoy the good things while they last, but I can't stop my mind from running a hundred miles an hour, rationalizing and predicting. And I know I'm usually right. Which is depressing, because all that it tells me is the human nature is to have highs, and then forget and fade back into mediocrity.
But while it's here, I'm going to make the most of it. I just am. It's all I got and, whether it lasts or not, I need to make some memories.
Thanks to everyone that's made the past two weeks possibly the best in my life. And I mean that.
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